4 Questions to Assess Your Mental Health
The mental health pursuit that so many around the world are taking part in is not just a fad. For so long the idea of mental health has been boiled down to whether or not you’re crazy or sane. People dealing with anxiety have been told to think positively. People dealing with depression have been told to just be happy. People dealing with suicidal thoughts have been treated as if their issue is short-term. For so long, we just haven’t known what to do. And the reality is, this mental health crisis that we find ourselves in isn’t new. It’s always existed. I think the greatest difference between before and now is that enough people have opened up that the reality can no longer be ignored.
I myself have struggled with anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts since I was 17. Back then I didn’t know what to call it, I just knew it wasn’t good. That’s when I turned to Jesus knowing that he is what I need. Understanding that, even though not all of my issues would be resolved in this world, the promise of Jesus is that I will be freed from those issues when he restores this world and he is here in all his glory.
It wasn’t until a few years ago when a friend of mine, in a small group that I was leading, told me I had bad anxiety that I really started looking into it. I denied I had any issues for a while but as they continued to get worse—as anxiety became debilitating and suicidal thoughts turned into suicidal sensations—that I actually reached out to get help.
Don’t try to do this alone!
And that’s my first piece of advice to anyone struggling with mental health, reach out and get help. Tell the people closest to you what’s going on and then get a therapist. I have seen primarily two different types of therapists and they’ve been helpful for me at different times. I’ve seen a counselor who helped me deal with traumatic situations from my past as a foster kid. I have also seen a clinical psychiatrist who has helped me understand the imprint on my brain those same situations left. Both gave me tools to help me get and remain healthy.
I still see my psychiatrist regularly and it’s the people closest to me, knowing the potential for me to spiral, that push me to continue that relationship. And my relationship with my psychiatrist is one of the most important relationships I have. In my ongoing appoints with him we catch up and he always asks me how I’m doing pursuing spiritual, emotional, and physical health. In my first appointment with him, he explained to me that those three things encompass what it means for me to be me. And it’s been in my consistent pursuit of those three things that’s been the difference between me being healthy and unhealthy.
I know that there are many blogs out there that talk about pursuing good mental health. This blog is not meant to tell you something new, but as my psychiatrist does with me, it’s meant to beg the question, how are you doing? With that being said, here are 3 questions to ask as you assess your mental health.
1 Are you pursuing a relationship with Jesus? (Spiritual Health)
This is typically the first question that I ask myself when I start to notice my mental health declining. When I’m busy, I find my pursuit of Jesus to be the first thing I put on the backburner. It seems to be the easiest thing to give up which makes no sense at all since it is the most important relationship I have in my life. Not even my relationship with my wife is more important than my relationship with Jesus. I say that, but then every time I replace consistency with Jesus with sleep (usually it’s sleep for me) I prove that to not be true.
Do not neglect your relationship with Jesus. Neglecting to pursue your relationship with Jesus is neglecting to pursue abundant life.
“Neglecting to pursue your relationship with Jesus is neglecting to pursue abundant life.”
Here are a few questions you can ask to assess your spiritual health:
Are you spending time in His word and in prayer?
Are you spending time with the people of God who are constantly encouraging you to pursue Jesus?
Are you practicing things like journaling or meditation?
2 Are you taking care of your body? (Physical Health)
The second thing I assess when I see my mental health declining is, am I taking care of my body? I really look at my consistency in two areas for this, am I going to the gym, and am I eating well? I am at my healthiest when I go to the gym 5-6 times a week. That’s not necessary for everyone, but I find that if I am not going that constantly, then I end up not going at all. In terms of diet, my wife and I love the whole30 as a lifestyle. The problem for us with the whole30, especially since I am a full-time pastor and eating out is a part of the culture, is that it’s very difficult to maintain. But we do our best to be consistent with our diet. Not perfect but consistent.
Don’t underestimate the effects of poor physical health on your mental health. They really do go hand in hand. If you’re not pursuing good physical health, here are a few things you can do to help you get started:
Ask the question, what physical activity can I do at least three times a week (going to the gym, walking, at-home workouts, hiking, climbing, etc)?
Ask the question, what are some changes that I can do with my diet that will allow me to consistently eat well and be healthy (don’t be afraid of research on this)?
Commit to doing it now! Even right now as I am writing this, in the middle of the holidays, it is possible to be healthy and still enjoy yourself. Doing small things like saying no to the cookies in the breakroom that you know aren’t worth it anyway.
3 Are you doing things that you enjoy? (Emotional Health)
Here’s the last question that I ask in assessing my mental health, am I doing things that I enjoy? The things that I enjoy are spending time with and serving my wife, preaching, reading, writing, going to the gym, hanging out with close friends, spending time with my dog, cooking, etc.
I think the two biggest mistakes we make here are we will either constantly neglect our emotional health by being overcommitted to other things, or we overindulge in the things we enjoy and we end up unhealthy in the other two areas (spiritual and physical). One of the things that you can do in order to help yourself emotionally is schedule time for you to do what you enjoy. And I know (not experientially) that if you have kids this can be difficult. I would suggest that you speak with other parents who have kids in a similar stage of life, are who have been there before, about what they do.
A few questions you can ask in your pursuit of emotional health are:
What are the things I enjoy?
Can the things I enjoy be a part of my regular routine (for me, one of those activities is cooking)?
Have I been doing things that I enjoy to the detriment of my spiritual and physical health?
4 Are your relationships healthy?
Okay, this last one is more like a bonus. Simply put, we were made to be in relationships with people. Our relationships really can impact our present and our future in greater ways than we may know. All you have to do to understand this is look at your past relationships and how they’ve affected where you currently are. You need people. But you don’t just need people who are encouraging you, you need people who you can also encourage.
Here are a few questions you can ask to assess the relationships in your life:
Are the people who are closest to me people that are pushing me to pursue Jesus?
Am I pushing the people who are closest to me to pursue Jesus?
Are the people closest to me people I want to be like in some form or fashion?
Am I or my closest friends constantly negative and belittling?